The Dark Night of the Soul is something that many of us know very little about, and yet it can mark a pivotal point in your journey to awakening.
The Dark Night of the Soul is like a rebirth. It is death of the old self and the birth of the true self.
In many ways it is the death of your ego, the character you have created in this game called life. Don’t get me wrong, although I’m partial to a good ego bashing now and again, we do actually need that little critter to survive. Without it, what would be the point in getting up in the morning, to go to work, to make our mark on the world.
Despite this, we need to be the one’s in charge. We can’t have our ego’s running the show. And for many of us they are.
Not dissimilar to the Tower card in Tarot, the DNOTS can feel a bit like your whole world is tumbling down. However the light at the end of the tunnel is a deeper understanding of who you really are. What remains is your truth, and what Is gone are all the illusions and lies you have told yourself, unknowingly throughout your lifetime. The ideas of what you associate your identity with, or the beliefs you previously held. It is as if the veil has been lifted and you can see everything for what it truly is, which at the time is absolutely terrifying.
You question your own sanity, as you cling on to whatever and whoever you thought you knew you were, but it is too late. Things have shifted and you cannot go back to the way things were. The only option is to keep on moving forward, into the abyss. To follow your intuition wherever it will lead, even if it makes very little logical sense.
At four years into my spiritual journey what I’ve come to realise, especially this year, is that despite having an initial death of self, we go through many other mini deaths along the way. Usually this precedes a period of intense change and soul growth. As my friend put it so eloquently this week, “When things are all plain sailing, we’re not growing. When it’s time to shift, the Universe will make it uncomfortable”.
Because why would we bother to change unless we had to?
This summer I experienced two mini dark nights, and currently feel like I’m in the midst of another one following the opening of the 11:11:11 gateway last Sunday.
Usually this starts with an overwhelming feeling of dread or fear. You begin question everything, and have a huge amount of doubt. It can feel like you’re spiralling into a void of uncertainty, and you are not even sure of the best course of action to get you out again. It feels like you’re stuck. Everything that was stable and solid a mere few days, or weeks prior appears to be crumbling. It can feel like you’re losing your mind and your grip on reality.
This is usually all just a test. A test of your inner strength and spirit. When we really listen to what our inner voice is telling us we all have the answers within us. We just have to quiet the mind long enough to truly hear what is being said. This is not a time for action, but a time to be. Often this can come in the shape of signs both from people, song lyrics, nature, numbers etc. There are signs are everywhere to help guide you, but if you’re running around in a state of panic you won’t see them.
So if you’re feeling incredibly lost right now, just know you’re not alone.
So many of us are going through similar experiences right now as we truly step onto our paths. When we get complacent the Universe just wants to give us a ‘little’ nudge. A bit like if you’ve fallen asleep on the night bus, and someone gives you a little tap on your shoulder to wake you up.
We all intuitively know where we’re going wrong, or where we are being complacent, so it is about redirecting our energy again so that things can flow a little easier.
The best thing you can do when you feel like this is to drop down into your heart space. Really get in with the feels. I find that moving my body whether in the gym, or a night of dancing helps to get me out of my head and to release all that unnecessary tension. And finally confiding in a supportive friend to gain another perspective really helps lift my spirits too. You never know what pearls of wisdom they will bestow on you.
Just be present and patient and trust that everything is going in exactly the right direction.